Hurt

What do you know about pain? You’ve had an easy life. You’re just being dramatic. You just need to let it go. Things can’t be that bad. You need to just suck it up. It could always be worse. I bet everyone of you have heard these statements and probably others that I can’t think of. I also bet that not one of these statements have ever made you feel better. I know it has never helped me. I decided to take a few minutes and rethink a couple of these statements.

You’ve had an easy life. Really? Who would know from the outside. Let’s relate this to a car where you slap a fresh coat of paint on the outside and she sure does look pretty, but what if you haven’t done anything to the engine? Is this car still pretty? Ok this car is life. We are trained from an early age in most cases to act on our best behavior when we are where people can see us and don’t discuss what goes on at home in front of company. So we have become a nation of great actors and are very good at covering up hurt with a fake smile.

Just suck it up. I’ll admit I have used this one on the people I loved the most because it’s easier than trying to understand what they’re going through. It’s easier in this life to see someone hurting and go well it ain’t my problem. They should just suck it up. No one cares about their drama. We should strive to understand what others are struggling with to understand the cross that they’re bearing and we should want to help them bear the weight of the cross because for some that weight can be crippling.

You just need to let it go. Some people want to more than anything in this world. For some they struggle and struggle with letting things go. Knowing they will be better off if they separate theirselves from the situation but they just can’t. They can’t look away, they can’t leave, they can’t stop caring, they can’t stop loving, and worst of all for some they don’t feel like they can be themselves without whatever is holding them back.

One of my favorites, it could always be worse. Could it? Do you know? Did you know that there’s a chance that person was at the end of their rope had tied a knot and was trying to hold on? What if the last time they ever spoke to someone that person dismissed their troubles and said “it could always be worse.” For some it can’t. For some this is as bad as they are willing to let it get. They are done with the pain done with the hurt done with everything this life has thrown at them so for them it can not get worse.

Now like I have said before I’m just a regular person no schooling not very bright but I have an idea. What about if we as a group tried a different approach? I’m sorry you’re hurting tell me about your pain. I know it’s hard to let go but I will be here with you through it all. I know I don’t understand how bad things are but I am willing to help in any way I can. I know things look bleak right now but just remember things can always get better. And to quote this book I am working through. This too shall pass. We need to be a loving pillar that props our friends and family up in times of despair not the anchor dragging them into the pit.