What is owed…

There are so many different ways to look at what is owed. Depends on where you’re at in your situation, depends on who is asking, but it always depends on expectations. For example I get up out of my bed before daylight at least five days a week to go to work. For this I get a paycheck, my company pays me what is owed. By doing this I provide for my family, pay my bills, and occasionally have a little left over.

So what do we do when we feel what is owed isn’t what we’re getting? How do we handle ourselves when we feel like we are getting slighted? If my previous statement is correct and all you are owed is based on expectations then where are these expectations created?

Let’s start with my previous example, work pays you what is owed. In most cases this is an expectation agreed upon by you and your manager. You agree on how much you make, you agree on how much you work, and you agree on how often you’ll get a paycheck. Those are all very easy to quantify. So how do you handle yourself when you are unhappy with a part of that equation? Do you ask for a pay increase, if you don’t get it do you get angry, do you go as far as to change jobs? What changed your expectations? I can honestly say I have left a job over unmet expectations. I thought I was working too hard, for too long, to be making so little.

Let’s go to a more sensitive topic, relationships. Who sets the expectations there? How do you determine what is owed? Is it a money thing. “I paid the last three times, they owe me this time.” Or how about a respect thing. “How can my kids treat me this way they owe me respect.” Another one that you often hear is “after all I’ve done for them don’t they owe me the truth?” I’m not saying that any of these are wrong or that you’re expecting too much, what I am saying is does everyone know what’s expected?

No the hardest expectations to qualify, quantify, or meet; the ones you have placed on yourself. Where do these expectations come from? Are they from your desire of the things of this world, or are they from God? I have to admit most of my self imposed expectations are related to having more stuff. I know it isn’t right, I know it isn’t Godly, and I know those expectations will never be met. As long as you are chasing this world you will never be happy, never be satisfied, and your expectations will be just a seed of doubt that has been placed in your heart. You will see the unmet expectations as proof that you aren’t good enough, that you’ll never be enough, I know because I live my life there.

If I’m honest I don’t want what is owed. I am, to quote the Notorious BIG “born sinner, the opposite of a winner”. As a sinner what we are owed is death. Romans 6:23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is everlasting life through Christ Jesus our lord. Our salvation is paid for by the blood of Jesus not through any works of your own. It does however come with some expectations. You are expected first and foremost to Love God. The second part is where it gets a bit tricky. You are expected to Love All People, Always. No matter what is owed, no matter what expectations were not met, no matter how slighted you feel; love all people, always. Hardest part for me is the realization that I (you) are one of the all people, and no matter how many times you have let yourself down you have to love yourself always.

I love you.